I recently had a conversation with a friend about what a “hot mess” I am. I don’t mean “hot” as in “sizzling hot mama,” I mean “hot–I’m always running around like a chicken with my head cut off and sweating.” I’m almost always a minute late. For everything. Rarely more than that but also rarely more than five minutes early. I feel like I try to be more time conscious, but there’s always something important that happens that messes with me. It might be washing the dishes quick or it might be a FaceBook status, but important none-the-less.
And then there’s the fact that I hardly ever worry. About anything. Even things I should worry about, I don’t. I kinda figure that if I don’t think about it, it won’t come true. I don’t spend a lot of time overthinking things either. My brother would have some mean comments about my abilities to overthink, but it really doesn’t have anything to do with that. I am very much a ‘face value’ type person. Overthinking takes so much energy. I have had many conversations with friends about that term––overthinking. For many, it causes sleepless nights and a brain that won’t shut off. For me, I am usually sleeping within minutes of laying down while my poor husband lays there trying to solve all the world’s problems.
Ya know how some people are “worst case scenario” people? I am definitely not one of them. I cannot bring myself to conjure up all the horrible things that could possibly happen and then worry about them preventing myself from enjoying the moments in life. I am often accused of having rose colored glasses on (now that I think about it, my glasses are rose colored!) and I just say, “yep, and I’m the one with the chronically positive attitude too.” In full disclosure, snakes might be one of the only things I turn into a worst case scenario. Those buggers do weird things to me; I turn into a raving lunatic if I even think I see one. It’s embarrassing and unnecessary, but some snake hating demon takes over rendering me powerless. Sounds terrible, huh!
My rule following husband can’t understand how I can be so lackadaisical. This is his favorite word to describe me. While I have a hard time being nailed down to a set schedule, he wants to know when and what the plan is at all times. I suppose I could try to be more on task and scheduled; however, I think our house might explode with tension! Rules and schedules really aren’t my thing. This little personality trait of mine can make teaching interesting at times. Turns out you have to have rules or you have 7th graders hanging from the ceiling.
I honestly cannot bring myself to be a worry-wart type person. I know some things are out of my control and in so many aspects of this world, what will be will be. I once read this anecdote about worrying; it is like riding a stationary bike. It is a lot of spinning of wheels without going anywhere. You really don’t accomplish anything.
Stephanie Oyler is a Messenger guest columnist and teacher at Onamia Schools.